Sometimes you just have to get it all out. In no particular order...
We lead a very simple life. It is one that makes me happy. I am not the type of person who needs or wants a million things or activities going on to fulfill me. I find that for me, when I am being pulled in too many directions, I become very irritable, stressed out and impatient. Even when they are good things pulling me in all those directions. But then on the other hand, I usually feel like I need to be doing more. Or creating more opportunity for my children. Dance lessons, swim lessons, preschool, play dates, dress up, trips to the library. Then the responsibility of teaching her about God and the gospel. There are so many things I feel like I should be doing in order to be an adequate mom. Is it necessary? In then end, when they are grown, what is going to mean the most to them?
In reality, it is the simple things that bring me the most comfort and happiness in life, such as being with my family and close friends.
Speaking of friends- since moving to the Tri-Cities I have felt frustrated in my attempts to become friends with people. I have met and made friends with many wonderful people, but a lot of times I would really like to take those friendships further. I don't know for sure why it seems harder to do that in this stage of my life. Is it because we have children now? Are there too many things going on in everyone's lives? Have I just not made enough effort?
I want good friends in my life. I am thankful for my peer moms who without knowing, inspire me on a regular basis to be a better person, wife and mother. I want to rub shoulders with these women who uplift me and make me want to be a better person. Not because they are perfect, but because they are not, yet they continually strive to do what's right, in spite of their weaknesses and the trials they face.
I am thankful for the non-LDS people who I have met. Sometimes I feel like I am in a Mormon bubble. I have met some really great people who are not of my faith, but who are great women. I want them in my life too.
I love my husband. He is a good man. I have never doubted his love for me. He loves me unconditionally, thank goodness! I love Katelyn and I am really looking forward to the new addition to our family. I am blessed.
5 comments:
Amen sista! I kinda know how you feel. We want to give our kids the same opportunities like swim lessons, sports teams, play groups, etc, but I think what is most important is for families to be together and able to form tight bonds. Yes, the "social" programs are great too, but there is a fine line between providing those opportunities and loosing the tigt bond because of your too busy life.
Jeff (especially) and I have found it hard to make friends too. It's like you become "friends" with someone, not because you really have much in common with them, but because you have kids around the same age.
Basically, I feel for you... and thank goodness our husbands love us just the way we are!
Thank you for the reminder of what really matters.
I hear you on the friendship part- I remember thinking Jan from good ol' Newport was sort of flighty. Now I understand why, kids do make it tough. It's hard when conversation is interrupted by coralling children.
Too bad, because as you said, we can be strengthed by each other.
I think espescially as women in the church we forget that we need that adult contact, and that as sisters in Relief Society we should rely on each other. I've found a different experience here in Pullman then in any other ward I've lived in. The sisters here are all really good friends. One of my friends here said that you never make as good of friends as you do at church because you serve together, you sing together, you pray together, and you cry together. And I have found that to be so true here in my current ward. It's just easy to forget. Keep trying!
Loved this post. Beautifully written from the heart.
I was just informed by my husband that this post sounded like I was begging for friends. Not so. Just expressing myself and wondering if others have felt the same. Love you hunny!
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